Why Relationships Fail, If only I had realized this sooner......

Last night it suddenly came to me as I was speaking to a friend that marriages or relationships fail for one major reason. When they are not getting the emotional, physical, mental attention they need or want, they turn to someone else, a friend, the internet, pornography etc. They will confide in a stranger, or a friend what they would not tell their spouse or loved one. Its easy to fall in love, really easy as far as you find someone that really turns your heart over and then all the chemical things take place, we get excited and happy to see them, our hearts race when we do see them. We feel as if the whole world is alright as long as we are with them. Then reality sets in...job, money, children, bills, and everything else. And suddenly piece by piece we forget what made us crazy in love. We forget how wonderful it felt. Then we start to forget to take care of our partner. They like us have emotional needs, mental needs, physical needs and spiritual needs. If we forget to pay attention we can start to lose those pieces of them and when we finally try to put it back together well we lose pieces or we give up. We confide in others, have conversations we should have with our spouses only. No matter how hard turning to our one and only is the only way to keep the marriage alive. IF and WHEN I ever get married again I feel as if I am going to try with everything I have to 10 years late for them to still feel as if they are still and always falling in love with me. I like others have made mistakes in marriage, we all do, but watching people who should be together who are wonderful couples, watching them treat each other poorly, and watching as they lose the fire and spark they one shared. I remember how great it was to fall in love, to have that excitement in my life. And I remember how good it felt to be excited to let them know they were on my mind all the time. I watch men and women as friends go do things together without their spouses, they say we are just friends. I say you should never go do anything with anyone of the opposite sex without their spouse and or yours. If you feel lost, unloved, unappreciated, not needed anymore its time to get into the safe zone. For an hour you sit on the couch, floor and hold a pillow. You take turns you each talk about one thing that really is hard for you, or you wish were different they you decide how to fix it. The pillows are therapeutic, you can squeeze them, hold them or just have them there if you want something to strangle (ha ha) joke people. I am not a therapist, by any means. Just a woman who has made mistakes, misses being in love, and knows I will make sure I am not the same as I was before. Look at your spouse and say this to yourself.." I will never do anything without you around I would not do in front of you, I will not say anything when your absent I wouldn't say in front of your face. I will defend your honor, support your choices even If I don't agree. And be grateful you have someone to hold onto tonight. Someone who loves you truly and completely. Well so much for my two cents on this subject.... NExt...